In Marks & Spencer: You’re a bit of a weakling, aren’t you, Angelica?
In Tottenham Court Road: Diamond! Crystal! I’ve dropped my straw!
In the park: You know how I look at my career? 39 steps.
At John Lewis: We can buy terracotta lookalikes – the other can go in the drainpipe area.
In the park: I got a special chicken to get into Kew Gardens. I went four times.
In the street: Have you seen Bruce Lee play ping pong with a nunchuck?
Lady: "See. I told you to ask the goth girl. Goth girls are always nice."
A girl on my bus just said “I can’t look at halloumi anymore because it just reminds me of him”. (@cechitch)
Trying to keep the status quo on the level. (@IntervalThinks)
Two ladies at an 80th bday party:
'I like to keep the brain going with Sudoku.'
'Do you dear? I find it frightfully dull after Bletchley.'
In Glastonbury: So I said I wanted to visit Bethlehem and we did, but it was just like Bridgwater. (LW)
Just overheard a woman say, "Please excuse my fingernails, I had to hitchhike here." (@Greebobek)
A small boy charged past me in Tesco this morning shouting "Baked beans here I come!" (LW)
I am in the shop. It is late in the afternoon. From the darkness outside in piercing South Welsh tones: "Well, what do you always need? You always need a taxidermy shop! Always!" (LW)
Caught snippet of suity conv in street “It injects a note of fun, in my humble opinion”. (@lucyfishwife)
No, I spent all my money on yogurt. (@celestialweasel)
Tube driver: There’s currently no interchange to the Central line at Holborn. I don’t know what the point of Holborn is without the interchange but there you go.
More here, and links to the rest.