When people hear the opposite...

I don't know why this happens.

In our old office, we had individual rooms (small). My desk faced the window, away from the door. People have the odd idea that it's deferential to be very, very quiet. They used to come in, wearing trainers on a thick carpet, and whisper "Hello". I would leap three feet in the air. So I put a notice on my door: "Please approach NOISILY". Guess what they did? In the end I turned my desk round. (Was it the same people who marked up a proof in tiny, faint writing? And failed to obey the instruction "keep tightly closed"?)

In our new office, I kept complaining it was hot and stuffy. Eventually two men with a ladder turned up, waving a chit. "Says here lady is too cold!" Turned out all previous handymen had done was turn my aircon OFF. I'd said "hot" every time.

I used to run a small singing group. I'd say "If you want to emphasise a syllable, use the vowel, not the consonants". They gave me more more consonants: Snap! Crackle! Pop! I asked for "piú legato" (smoother). They gave me more staccato ("cut short crisply", says the dictionary).