Friday 30 November 2018

Howlers: Misspellings



Predictive text turns definAtely into defiantly – it may be responsible for some of the following.


She plumed the depths. (It’s plumbed, from plumbum, lead. You measure depth with a lead weight on a string.)

The head-waiter was very swarve. (He was suave.)
Let's head off for sunnier climbs! (Climes.)
She saddled up to to me and whispered... (Sidled up to.)
Doths cap. (Doffs – the opposite of "don".)
This is under-handed, two-faced hippocracy! (Hypocrisy.)

She revealed a few unpalletable truths. (Unpalatable or distasteful.)
The head Tibetan Buddhist is the Dali Lama. (Dalai.)
Low and behold! (Lo!)
These trousers have an elastic acted waist. (Elasticated.)

I love the smell of Eau de Colon! (Cologne.)
A few foreign digitories attended Castro’s funeral. (Dignitaries.)
Tony Blair should be tried at the Haig! (Hague.)
Pinter was a famous playwrite. (playwright)

You find sea anomies in rock pools. (Anenomies.)
I can't be doing with all that polava! (Palaver.)
They were in the throws of moving house. (It’s “throes” or agonies, nothing to do with rugs.)
Pug ugly. (Plug ugly.)

The villain had a long wrap sheet. (Rap sheet. It’s a list of your crimes, as in bum rap, or beat the rap.)

I was hypmatised into spending too much. (Hypnotised.)
What better layer for Marvel Studios ' superheroes? (Lair.)
Viola! or Wa-la! for Voila!
The attack was viscous.  (Vicious.)
Portions were miniscual. (Minuscule.)

Barnier’s Brexit mantle-clock ticks. (A mantel goes over a fireplace; a mantle goes round your shoulders.)

Things have gone array! (Awry.)
You’ll be pillared if you don’t get your figures right. (Pilloried.)
They had vestige interests. (Vested.)

This person who sucks up new age ideas like a sponge and reagitates them when they are in the presence of others. (Regurgitate.)

We have many similar proprieties in the area. (Properties.)
Clothes were policed by presumptory laws. (Sumptuary laws.)
The curtains were decorated with cruelwork panels. (“Crewel woek” is a style of embroidery.)
My favourite genre is film nuar. (Noir.)

Their troubles were deep seeded. (Deep seated.)
Day today living. (Day-to-day.)
She was always shoving in her two penneth. (Two penn’orth, like two cents.)
The scene was like a dream - it was so real. (Surreal.)

Top hoe, 
old boy! (It’s top hole.)
Hey Preston, cured! (Hey presto! Phrase used by conjurers. Presto is Italian for fast.)
It earned him great cudoz. (It's kudos, and it's singular. You can't have one kudo.)

Until the day when desktop holography becomes a reality, 3D will remain the wholly grail of the graphics world. 
(Holy Grail.)


After a while you look like a bully or simply dilutional and arrogant. (Delusional – in a discussion about self-esteem.)

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