Interview Wear

Lifted from Irritated Tulsan's blog.

Men:

15. Sports jackets with jeans, it’s the only way to ensure the interviewee will not think you’re a douche. Pop (turn up) your collar for extra hipness. Don’t forget the pink undershirt.

14. Wear a beer keg tie.

13. Display a trendy cause. “Live Strong” bracelets never get old.

12. For shoe attire, Old Navy flip-flops.

11. Everyone is wrong; V-Neck shirts don’t look creepy on men. Best worn if you’re hairy.

10. Corporate America loves large earring gauges. You can never have too many holes.

9. Don’t forget to tip your hat at a 20-degree angle.

Women:

8. Display your tramp stamp (lower-back tattoo - Translator's note). Wear a shirt that is two sizes too small. Tramp stamps are best seen when framed with muffin-tops.

7. The power suit is still acceptable, but only if the shoulder pads make you look like a football player.

6. Accessorize with your shiniest spiked dog collars. Baking Soda and water are a green alternative to polish those spikes.

5. Pink blouses work, but only if they’re covered in white skulls.

4. Accentuate your eyes with tattooed teardrops and glitter eye shadow.

3. Low-cut tops should never be above the navel.

2. For footwear, f*** me pumps.

1. Keep yourself organized and current. Use a Hello Kitty planner.