Loopy Logic: Conclusion Several Hops from Premise

It's all Ian's fault

Second-guessing, third-guessing: if we do this, this will happen, and then that will happen and that will be bad because... Includes accusing others of holding terrible opinions an ocean away from their original statement. 

Socialism is evil because Stalin.

Nietzsche caused Trump. (Or was it “postmodernism”?)
Is anti-vaccinism Jean-François Lyotard’s fault? (He was a postmodernist.)

The new left caused the rise of fascist youth.
Ian Hislop (or “the liberal elite”) caused ultra-right-winger Katie Hopkins, according to Katie Hopkins.
Luther caused the Holocaust.
Obama caused ISIS.
Jeremy Corbyn caused Brexit.

Medicare is socialism and socialism is bad because Pol Pot.
Atheism is bad because Pol Pot.

Edward Heath is innocent because witch hunt.
We're afraid of terrorists, so let's – whinge about women's clothes!

The nuclear family/permissive society caused all the evils in the world today. (Not heard so much these days.)

Conservative MP Nick Fletcher says Doctor Who being played by a woman has pushed young men into crime. (@AdamBienkov)

Why do you object to people saying "Can I get a latte?" America's political and cultural hegemony concerns me. (@writetjw)

And if you criticise our anti-Semitic misognyist terrorist-fetishising bullying cult, you clearly hate starving children. (@MatzoBalling. Also anyone who objects to racism “hates their own country”.)

You are criticising this headmaster who won’t let children leave the room to throw up because: You think children ought to be told they are miserable. You want to demonise teachers.

Making cycling helmets compulsory causes obesity because fewer people cycle. More people now die of obesity-related conditions than died because they didn’t wear a cycling helmet. 

Let’s pedestrianise Oxford Street because it’ll encourage people to use cars less and then they’ll walk instead and lose weight and not be obese and be a drain on the NHS which is paid for by my taxes. (Nobody has driven down Oxford Street for about 40 years - private cars are banned.)

What do we want? We want everyone to be good. How we gonna get it? Get them to believe in God. How we gonna do that? Attack a 19th century biologist.

The accusers of Lord Janner are attention-seeking fantasists because the Salem witch trials and Sir Thomas More. (And it’s OK for me to prejudge the accusers because people have prejudged Lord Janner.)

And “I doubt Janner’s alleged victims’ memory because I hate to see the usual lynch mob on the march.” 

I left the protest because I saw a banner about “toxic masculinity”. It’s divisive. Much of the left seems out of touch with the working class and things like this are only going to widen that divide. (JP, paraphrase)

Without care, sabotaging Brexit will only lead to a surge in support for the nasty right. And if you add to that the possibility of Rees Mogg becoming Prime Minister you end up with something quite scary. (JP)

Blaming substances and inanimate objects for human failings is what created the police state we are all now suffering under. (@Maggie_McNeill)

Those being vicious about people in North London drinking champagne feel threatened by groups caring for other groups. They want everyone to vote for themselves or their own group, because otherwise groups might band together and defeat them. They don’t want people acting out of compassion – they call this “tribalism”. For the same reason they hate anyone to mourn for “someone they don’t know”.

We must give girls confidence by selling them fewer pink toys and princess dolls and then they’ll grow up to be scientists. (Many weird reactions to problems are due to those in charge thinking the solution to everything is “raise self-esteem”. You have a troublesome employee who slacks off and turns up late and takes advantage? Give him more responsibility! It'll raise his self-esteem!)

I say that in my childhood adults were obsessed with our ability to catch or hit a ball. Men reply: So you’d stop people watching Wimbledon? (Paraphrase.) 

You can always branch to a different, unrelated problem: Philosopher Mary Warnock says "Let’s worry about the quality of life of those who are allowed to live, instead of worrying about abortion". (Whataboutery.)

Most people are going broke because of prices of energy, food and petrol. There is a climate crisis. There are major wars. But a small minority of right wing culture war feminists who most earn over £50,000 are obsessed by this issue. Just because they want Tories in power. (@Christo28802370. He's referring to protests about men in women's sport, changing rooms, toilets etc. £50,000 pa? In my dreams!)

We want people to treat the environment better, so let's make them look at the stars so that they’ll feel a bit less important. (It’s like building a Heath Robinson machine to butter a slice of toast.)

More here, and links to the rest.