Sean Jones KC
How the Judge describes your submissions versus what the Judge means:
Eloquent: I’m about to find against you.
Careful, meticulous: Way, way too long.
Scholarly: Oh, no – footnotes!
Creative: You’re not as clever as you think you are, you weasel!
Bold: How dare you!
Novel: This is the first time anyone’s been foolish enough to try this on.
Is there anything further? There had better not be.
There is one point which troubles me: Let me explain why you case is a load of old cobblers.
Barrister Max Hardy adds:
Daring: Are you insane?
Concise: At least you haven’t wasted my time.
Simon Myerson KC adds:
Just help me with this: I have identified the irremediable flaw.
Very interesting: utterly irrelevant.
Yes, thank you: You’ve finished.
I have your point: You’ve finished and you’ve lost.
Your counsel has said everything that can be said on your behalf: Immediate custody.
Sean Jones again:
Counsel’s spirited submissions: He kept talking over me and refused to take my hints that he was making things worse.
Ben Williams adds:
Erudite submissions: Beyond me.
Spirited submissions: We did not crush your spirit this time, but we are working on it.
Helpful: Helped me realise they were wrong.
Logical: But wrong.
Brave: Obviously wrong.
These all mean "too long": thorough, extensive, comprehensive, meticulous, forensic, detailed, full
On Murder, Mystery and My Family, when Sasha Wass says "I think I can help you, Jeremy...", she means "I think I have the facts and arguments that will demolish your objection."