Tuesday 13 October 2015

The Demon Drink 4

If we want people to drink less, couldn't we stop this kind of thing?

Social media is going crazy, ladies. I have to ask – where do you keep the wine?
Nowhere – it’s a dry boat.

(News item on team of 40-ish women ("ordinary mums") aiming to row to Tenerife for charity.)

At 10.30 she drinks a Guinness with a packet of salt and vinegar crisps. Isn’t that wonderful?
(About a 100-year-old woman)

Old lady: I don’t like tea – I like gin. (Aldi advert)

Here are some tips on drinking less from the Times:

1. Go cold turkey.
Go somewhere where alcohol isn't an option.

2. Don't tell people you have given up.
I usually nurse a glass of champagne. Nondrinkers make drinkers uncomfortable – better to practise some deception. (Maybe drinkers will grow up one day.)

3. Don't be purist.
Drink a toast at a wedding, eat a sherry trifle. (But not if you're a recovering alcoholic.)

4. Invent a fabulous nonalcoholic drink that goes with food –
iced tea... soda with a dash of Angostura. (What happened to non-alcoholic wine and beer, Amé and Aqua Libra? Cranberry or lime juice and soda is good too.)

You can call Alcoholics Anonymous on 0800 9177650, or email them at help@aamail.org.

More tips here from Dry July.

More here, and links to the rest.


  1. Yes. When you are aware of others' struggles, you see how bizarrely obsessed the world is with drink, and how odd to be quite so accepting and jovial about it.

  2. I really think it would help if we stopped using it as a cheap laugh.